As I stare at my screen in the quiet of another sleepless night, I find myself once again consumed by thoughts of Sir. The distance between us feels more tangible in these hours, the time zone difference making our connection both a blessing and a challenge. I can’t help but wait eagerly for the moments when our worlds overlap, those precious times when I can hear his voice or read his words.
The anticipation of our next conversation keeps me awake, my mind racing with excitement and longing. The emotional bond we share is so intense and profound that it often overwhelms me, leaving me breathless and restless. I find myself replaying our interactions, imagining his instructions, and feeling the thrill of our power exchange reverberate through my body.
Technology has become both a lifeline and a tease, keeping us connected but also keeping me awake. The red dot on Discord feels like a beacon of hope, promising another message, another call, another chance to feel close to him despite the miles that separate us. I stay up, glued to my phone or computer, my heart racing with every notification, my soul yearning for his touch, even if it's for a distasteful joke.
He doesn’t know how much I cherish his friendship too. While we go weeks without playing, talking to him throughout the day has just become part of my routine in my daily life. He has become one of my best friends, my best confidant, and honestly the one person I trust the most in this world. He is always honest, has an incredible sense of empathy, and has really taken the time to get to know me in a way that best friends do. While I may see Amy almost daily, we don't have near the connection that he and I share. Nor do I share with her those darkest parts of my mind—for with him, I can be fully myself and not worry that he is going to judge me but rather will just offer his view of whatever we are discussing and bring things to light I haven't seen yet.
Even though we are apart, the physical arousal from our virtual interactions is just as powerful. The desire he ignites within me lingers long after our sessions end, making it impossible to find peace and sleep. The intensity of our connection leaves me in a state of longing and anticipation, my body and mind unable to settle.
His presence in my life, even from afar, fills me with such a profound sense of love and admiration. I cherish the emotional depth we share, the way he understands and fulfills my needs, and the way he commands my heart and mind. The loneliness I feel without him in the odd hours that separate us daily is a testament to how deeply I care, how much I crave his guidance and affection.
While he doesn’t say it, I know in my heart he really cares for me. As time passes, the examples of his commitment to me become more clear. It’s the way he sighs in a voice message about a letter I’ve sent, or the crack in his voice when he confirms that this is special for him too. It's knowing the perfect moment for a joke knowing it will make me laugh and smile. His patience with me and my sucky gaming abilities. The way he says, "Aww you" when I've done something overly cute. What floored me the most, and I can't stop thinking about it, is the fact that he was thinking about how to help me this week. That is more than being a friend; it's being a partner who helps when someone they truly care for is hurting.
It's when I realize that my mind is spinning around with all of these thoughts that I again find peace with him. Rather than overthink this, I focus on spending these sleepless nights fantasizing about our future encounters, planning ways to please him, and imagining the day we can be together. It is the very reason for the letters, poems, pictures, and videos—an intentional shift in focus to pleasing him. The thought of being in his presence, of feeling his touch and hearing his voice in person, keeps me going. It’s a powerful motivator, but also a source of endless reflection and yearning.
Writing this now, in the stillness of the night, I realize how much I adore and admire him. He is my anchor, my guide, and my love. The distance and sleepless nights are a small price to pay for the depth of connection we share, and I wouldn’t trade it for anything. Thank you, Sir, for being my Dom, my partner, and my everything.
With all my love and devotion,
Scarlet
Comments